Welcome to Scrolls and Trolls

Dear Caecilius Swiftus Maximus, This letter constitutes as notification of your Chariot-Lyft driver termination effective as of Marcus Tullius Cicero’s consulship. Attached below is a reminder of the Chariot-Lyft Driver Independent Contractor Agreement: Welcome to the Future of Imperial Transport! By checking the box (or marking this tablet with an ‘X’), you agree to the following legally binding edicts. Failure to comply will result in account deactivation, public shaming, o

PERSONAL INFORMATION Full Legal Name: The name that can be named is not the eternal Name Permanent Address: Everywhere and anywhere Email Address: None EDUCATION & TEST SCORES High School GPA: -- Applicant Note: He devotes all his energy but has no intention to hold on to the merit. When success is achieved, he seeks no recognition. I have removed myself from the curriculum. SAT/ACT Scores: 400 Applicant Note: The world is a divine vessel, It cannot be acted upon as one w

PART I: Invocation of the Tracking Number Sing to me, O Muse, of my package, of my beautiful baby bubble-wrapped wanderer/traveler/nomad. Driven off the workshops of Guangzhou and shipped to the salted sorting centers of the West. Tell of the man—the Consumer, a.k.a me—waiting solemnly by her windows, heart heavy for her soon-to-be $2.99 ergonomic matcha whisk.  Many the sorting hubs it saw, and many the underpaid handlers too. For though the Consumer prayed to the gods and s