Cozy Labyrinth in the Heart of Crete, Hosted by Asterion

★★☆☆☆ 2.3/5

47 reviews

“Unique stay. Not for everyone.”

About this place

Welcome to the Labyrinth—a one of a kind underground abode offering an authentic Minoan experience unlike anything else in the world (perfect for you girls that want a Greek summer without visiting the generic places like Mykonos… this place is NICHE! Perfect for the gram).

The space features hundreds of interlocking stone corridors, vaulted ceilings throughout, and a moody, torchlit ambiance that guests have described as “atmospheric,” “genuinely ancient,” and “I cannot find the bathroom.” Natural light is limited by design. This is intentional and also structural—but we hear you and are working on it. 

The Labyrinth was designed by Daedalus of Athens from Daedalus&Co. (verified architect, currently unavailable for follow-up questions regarding the floor plan—he has left the country under circumstances we are not at liberty to discuss). His work speaks for itself. It does not, however, come with a map. Requests for a map will be noted and not fulfilled. 

Your host, Asterion, lives on-site. He is always home.

The space

Bedrooms: Technically unlimited. Locating them is part of the experience.

Bathrooms: Present. Directional assistance not provided.

Wifi: No. The walls are six feet of solid Cretan limestone. We have looked into it.

Layout: Described by the architect as “perfect to… host tributes”

Heating: Torch-based. Torches will be provided at check-in. Guests are encouraged to keep a hold of them. Guests who do not keep a hold of them are encouraged to remain calm.

Parking: N/A. You will not be entering or leaving by car.

Where you will sleep

The primary sleeping area is located somewhere in the eastern corridor, or possibly the western corridor, depending on which way you came in and how many times you’ve made since. The bed is comfortable. Several guests have found it. The mattress is Minoan-era straw with a modern linen overlay, which your host Asterion selected himself and is quite proud of. He has good taste. He has, in many ways, never had the opportunity to develop it fully, and he finds the hosting experience extremely rewarding. 

There is also a secondary sleeping area. The location is unknown at this time. We will update this listing when it is rediscovered.

Guest access

Guests will have full access to the Labyrinth, which is to say: guests have access to whichever parts of the Labyrinth they are able to locate, which is to say: guests have access to the entrance corridor and whatever they can find after that, which is to say: good luck, and welcome, and please do not run.

Running tends to confuse the acoustics.

Other things to note

Asterion is a gracious host but he is large, and the corridors are narrow, and if you hear breathing that is not your own, that is him, and he is simply curious about you, and you should stand still and speak calmly and maybe ask him about the linen selection because he loves talking about it.

The Labyrinth is a smoke-free property except for the torches, which are mandatory.

Guests are reminded that checkout is self-directed. Previous guests have described the checkout process as “character building,” “the defining experience of my life,” and “I emerged a different person.” One guest described it as “fine, honestly, once you find the thread.” We are looking into the thread situation. The thread was not provided by us and we have asked the individual responsible to stop.

No pets. Asterion finds it distracting.

House rules

• Check-in: Any time. The door is always open. The door is, in fact, the only part of this property with a clear location.

• Checkout: Self-directed. Best of luck.

• No parties or events. The acoustics carry everything and Asterion has feelings.

• No additional guests. The booking is per person and also Asterion counted.

• Quiet hours: All hours. The Labyrinth amplifies sound in ways that are difficult to explain and upsetting to experience.

Reviews

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ — Theseus, Athens “Found everything I was looking for. Checkout was straightforward once I had a system. Host was intense but present. A unique experience. Would not return.”

⭐ — Tribute #7, Athens “The listing said ‘cozy.’ I want to discuss what that word means.”

⭐⭐ — Tribute #12, Crete “Arrived Tuesday. Still here. The linen is actually very nice. Asterion and I have been talking. He’s not what I expected. Updating to two stars for the conversation. Minus three stars for everything else.”

⭐⭐⭐ — Anonymous, Athens “Checked in as a group of fourteen. Checked out as a group of one. The one had a lot to say about personal growth. Three stars.”

⭐⭐⭐⭐ — Daedalus, Athens (verified) “Incredible property. I designed it. Four stars because I feel bad about the floor plan and this is the only way I can express that.”

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ — Asterion, Crete (host response) “Thank you for visiting. I hope you found what you were looking for. I hope you found the bed. I found the bed. It is very comfortable. Please come back. Nobody comes back. This is fine. Five stars from me to all of you. I mean it.”